I don’t know about you, but my entire Instagram, Facebook and Snapchat feeds are absolutely bursting with people on overseas holidays.
All of the amazing photos made me incredibly jealous and also pretty nostalgic for my Europe trip last year. I cannot believe it has been over a year since I got home (close to a year and a half!) so I decided to have a little scroll through my Europe album on my laptop, which is where I found these beauties that I couldn’t help but share.
The photos are were all taken in Berlin which I visited at the very end of my trip. I had 2 days there with my Topdeck family (miss you guys) before we said goodbye and then 1 night with my travel buddy before she flew home, leaving me to fend for myself for 4 days. Now I’m not quite sure why the hell I thought I’d be okay to take on Berlin by myself for 4 days after a month and a half of being surrounded by people… I’d also spent the better half of the year before I left dealing with a depression and anxiety diagnosis (unknown at that point I was actually suffering from social anxiety which made the whole situation worse).
But I did it.
I definitely struggled. I spent 2 nights and an entire day hiding in my AirBnb, only leaving to eat, because I was so scared of what was behind that door. I cried a lot over a 24 hour period and just wished I could go home. But after I calmed down I realised I was in Berlin. I had 2 days left. I could hide or I could go out an explore. So, after a solid few hours of planning train routes and destinations in the city all while convincing myself I would be okay if I left the room, I did it. I also took these wonderful photos along the 2 days I made myself leave the room.
I look at them now and not only am I nostalgic, but I am proud. I have come a really long way since I was travelling. I may still have those kind of days, but the anxiety I feel towards these kinds of social situations doesn’t affect me the way that it did during this 2 months. I’m also proud because I realised after coming home that I had a lot more issues than I thought and I started seeing someone again (which is how I found my fabulous psychologist, Steph). Looking back I realise this was a terrible time for me but also a turning point to making myself better so I will always be thankful for that.
Anyway, enough rambling from me – enjoy some of my favourite photos from Berlin.